Smile! If You Feel Good, They Will Come

When I was a kid, my mom would always say:

“Sounds great, Katie... but can you smile?”

So I’d smile–reluctantly–just to make her happy. But deep down, I hated it. It felt fake, even though I knew she was right. She knew how much I loved fiddling and wanted the world to feel it, too.

Still, it was a real-life struggle to concede to smiling.

Then one day, years later, I saw a video of myself playing—and yikes.

I looked miserable. My mom was right! If I’d just listened, I could’ve skipped a whole decade of looking grumpy on stage. That kicked off my full-blown internal debate:

“But I play music for me, not for you people.”
“Does it really matter if I smile?”
“I’m focusing so hard—how am I supposed to smile too?”

Those thoughts rattled around my head for years, and honestly, they’re valid! Smiling while playing can feel like just one more impossible expectation.

After decades on stage, I discovered something bigger: maybe I was taking music a little too seriously.

Yes, focus matters. Yes, getting things “right” helps you improve.

But you know what actually makes your playing feel alive? Connecting to the music in a way that’s emotional, present, and real.

When I started looking for the awe, the joy of the groove, and the playfulness in each tune... the smiles just started happening naturally.

And on the days when they didn’t? Sometimes starting with a smile helped me get there. Kind of like answering the phone with a fake smile and accidentally becoming cheerful anyway. 😉

So if you’re wondering, “why don’t I look joyful?” Try this (instead of forcing a smile)!

✨ 1. Notice a chord that gives you a lift
🎶 2. Identify a note pattern that just feels good under your fingers
🌀 3. Find a bow stroke that flows like butter

And tune into that.

Let’s use a specific tune as an example...

Whoa Mule is one of my go-to tunes when I want to feel my playing more than think about it. It’s playful, grounded, and full of opportunity to experiment.

In the A Part, I’ll keep the notes the same but mess around with the bowing: first single bows, then two-note slurs and three-note slurs.

Nothing flashy—just tuning into my bow arm, letting it find what feels groovy that day. Later in the phrase, sometimes I stay high and lyrical, sometimes I drop low and earthy. Each choice offers a different vibe—and both bring me joy when I’m paying attention.

Then the B Part comes in, and I’m all in. It starts with a juicy half note over an E minor chord—so simple, but so satisfying. Then there’s that sneaky Bb—a bluesy little twist that gives the tune its spark.

It’s not about perfection. It’s about connection. And when I connect? That’s when the music shines. That’s when I smile for real.

Try it:

🎻 1. Pick a tune you love.
🎻 2. Slow it down.
🎻 3. Notice what feels good—in your bow, your hand, your ears.
🎻 4. Let that guide your expression.

Feel it. Hear it. Let it move you. When you stop performing happiness and start experiencing it in the music, the smile will shine through.

And if it doesn’t? That’s fine too. Just play what makes you feel something.